[His brow tightens in a mixture of disbelief and muted irritation.]
I am amazed I did not end it there and then, knowing what would become of me upon death.
[Was the other him truly that happy, so fulfilled in his life that he would risk dying and turning at any moment? What if something terrible happened to him one day? What if he dropped dead, and wasn't found for days? It would have been too late by then, and Hadriel would have become like Bear Den, menaced by its own scourge—
The what-ifs lead down a dangerous road of contemplation, one he's not comfortable with at all.]
cw: vague suicidal ideation
I am amazed I did not end it there and then, knowing what would become of me upon death.
[Was the other him truly that happy, so fulfilled in his life that he would risk dying and turning at any moment? What if something terrible happened to him one day? What if he dropped dead, and wasn't found for days? It would have been too late by then, and Hadriel would have become like Bear Den, menaced by its own scourge—
The what-ifs lead down a dangerous road of contemplation, one he's not comfortable with at all.]