redshiftlogs | persona non grata. [OPEN]

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persona non grata. [OPEN]

WHO: Rey and you!
WHAT: After keeping her distance for a while, Rey runs into the inevitable -- other people. And also an obsessive mutant cat that seems to follow her wherever she goes.
WHERE: All over Anchor.
WHEN: Month of October.

NOTES: I have a strong preference towards prose but I can handle brackets as well!

i. Bar;

There were periods in which Rey would spend days without seeing or communicating with another person. An unhealthy habit for sure, but it was something she had become used to during her period in the sky prison, carefully evading the synthetic wards among the labyrinthine corridors and inner tunnels and pipes. For someone as heavy and lumbering as Rey, she was surprisingly agile and stealthy. It also helped that she had plenty of experience in knowing where to go and how to avoid being seen.

Right now she's not spending much effort in doing so. After all, she's found that this isn't in fact the sky prison. There's no IV or synthetic sentry in sight, as far as she can tell. If there were... Well, she would just have to deal with them as they came.

Today, she just wants a drink or twenty. Except every time she orders, the fucking robot bartender gets her order wrong. And it couldn't have possibly gotten her order more wrong if it threw its memory core through a trash compactor where it belonged.

"Useless heap of fuck-metal shit," Rey seethes as she tosses the tequila sunrise aside. "Don't you know how to-- AUGH."

Luckily, she's not too drunk to avoid ducking in time as another tequila sunrise goes sailing over her head, intended for her face. The glass shatters against the wall, spilling liquor across the floor and then some.

Hissing between her teeth, Rey straightens herself immediately, fingers balled into fists as her eyes widen at the robot. "You motherfucker, you planned that, didn't you!"

Honestly, you just can't trust robots. None of them.

ii. Mess Hall;

Much like her social habits, eating is something Rey has been putting off for a while. There's plenty of water and booze at the bar, but you can only go on for so long on a liquid diet before the body starts to crave for something more.

Rey, on the other hand, could stave off those urges for months if she had to. If she had to being the key phrase here. Once it became glaringly obvious that she doesn't have to starve herself in order to evade whatever authority or presence here, or if it even matters to do so at all, she finally takes the risk to venture deeper into the depths of the city for something more than just scouting the vicinity. She could survive without food and water longer than a human, but that doesn't mean the urge doesn't creep up on her after a few weeks. Then, once again, it's about survival rather than obstinacy and pride.

Upon arriving there, however, she's not quite sure what to do with herself anymore. She's never cooked before, at least never any complicated meals that didn't come already prepped out of a can. She grimaces at the pre-made options, most which look to be well passed their expiration.

"Wehhhh," comes a whiny voice at her heel.

Rey looks down to see the same one-eyed tripedal feline bumping its head against her knee. It's been following her after she ran into some other weirdo at the bar, and she hasn't been able to shake the thing ever since. It doesn't take an animal person to assume what it probably wants, though. "Guess you must be hungry, huh?"

Naturally, the cat doesn't answer, though you never know. The last saptient being pretending to be just another animal turned out to be pretty wordy in the end.

No such luck this time. Just another flat "weehhh" as the feline sits on its hindquarters to paw at her with its one front paw. Chances are more likely that it's trying to urge her to care for herself first, but hell if Rey is going to take that hint.

iii. Bottom Levels;

Despite a perfectly functional barracks in the upper floors, Rey doesn't make herself known there. Being in places where people can expect to find her, where she can be easily tracked, is not something she is accustomed to. It's better to make herself scarce wherever possible. Don't get comfortable. Keep moving. No use in getting attached to whatever lifestyle they're expected to have here. And she refuses to become a complacent little hamster in a cage. No, that's not her. She won't let it happen; not if she has a say in the matter.

What few hours of sleep she allows herself ends up being in the most awkward places. Sometimes she can be found at the plaza or park, eyes mostly closed, only peering through slits as she stands in the middle of a walkway or shoulder leaning against a wall -- quietly snoring and drooling a little out the corner of her mouth until she's nudged awake by a concerned or amused passersby.

Other times she is pouring over what remains of the library, though barely able to keep herself cognizant of the words in front of her before nodding off at a desk. From time to time she'll jolt herself awake, slamming her forehead against the tabletop.

That damned cat might be accompanying her again, pawing and nudging at her as if trying to communicate some message that she refuses to diciper. Honestly, she figured that it would have moved on by now once it realized she had nothing special to offer it, but no matter what she does the animal always seems to find its way back to her. It would be annoying if it didn't also didn't help keep her awake at the same time. Small miracles, indeed.

iv; Wildcard

[ooc: Have something else in mind you'd like to do with Rey, or none of the above suit your fancy? Make your own or hit me up! Also feel free to check out my CR meme comment for info/ideas.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

...It's clear pretty fast that there's something of a misunderstanding here.

"What? No, that's not..." Sigh. "Just not about to make any expectations here."

Safer that way. Keeps from setting herself up for disappointment in the future. Plus finding even a temporary residence sounds like such a pain to deal with when she's barely sleeping and doesn't have that much shit to cart around.

Unfortunately, Rey's intent goes completely missed.

"Why is that? Is it often that people leave?"

Rey looks at Elleru like maybe the other woman hit her head or something.

"Don't they always?"

Live long enough, and you don't get attached to the concept of permanence and long-term notions.

She shakes her head, thinking only of the immediate, surface-level implications rather than the deeper ones.

"I do not know. I have not been here long, and I have only met a few, but... what time I have had with them will be cherished."

She offers Rey a smile, one genuine and playful. "The same goes for you, Rrey. If this is the only time we meet, we should not waste it."

To say that Rey's never been a fan of the instant gratification concept is an understatement. Meeting people for the sake of the experience has always sounded like a waste of time.

"Sounds like a waste of time," Rey says aloud, scratching her forehead as an excuse to avoid eye contact. Her brows knit together in frustration. "Seriously. What is anyone supposed to get out of that shit?"

Fun? She doesn't really have fun.

Rey rebuffs another of Elleru's attempts at friendliness, and her ears dip again, a quiet sigh escaping her as she purses her lips. She had hoped this seemingly trustworthy upright would prove a valuable ally, someone she could confide in -- she is the only one who has seen her natural form, after all, even if she doesn't know it was her that day in the baths.

"You make friends," she reiterates quietly, her magenta eyes falling on the cat near her feet. "Do you not want any? Or are you afraid because you may lose them?"

Rey lowers her hand to give Elleru a sidelong look.

"Not a fear when it just happens."

That made more sense in Rey's head. And, well, it still does, in a way. If she expects it, then she doesn't have to be afraid of something bad happening when it does. A knife in the back. Hatred. Disgust. Betrayal. Doesn't matter so long as she can see it coming, right? Right...

That look tells Elleru all she needs to know. She gives Rey a genuine, but knowing smile.

"A fear, then. It is okay to be afraid, and to hold those you would fear to lose close. I believe I would do the same, if I had someone I was afraid to lose."

And she offers Rey a look of her own with a hint of a nod, as though Rey could be one of those people.

Edited 2019-10-29 06:15 (UTC)

Ugh, why'd she have to go and say it that way?

"Don't have to worry if there's no one to lose."

It seems logical on the conceptual level. Rey doesn't have to fear pain and loss so long as she has nothing. Could anyone consider that living? Probably not, but who's to say that she deserves that right to live? Even when those she has hurt the most seemed to have given her a semblance of absolution to move on with her life, she wouldn't even know where to begin in doing so. It's not like she has ever been normal, done normal things and fretted over normal problems. How would she know where to even start?

Rey might not be normal, but neither is Elleru. She pulls a nearby chair to her, sliding into the seat, making herself comfortable at Rey's table for the time being.

"That is a lonely life. Tell me the truth, Rrey: do you not want for yourself?"

Dammit, she's sitting down now, asking questions and trying to get close. Rey can't help but remember how their last conversation went... even if Elleru doesn't seem to act like she knows, and maybe she doesn't. People's memories seem to work weird in this place. The next time they meet, will only one of them even remember this conversation? Does the outcome of this interaction really matter, in the end?

"Why?" Rey scoffs. "Wanting something just ends in disappointment, anyway."

She wanted... something, with Faye. What it was specifically, she's not sure she cares to entertain the thought. But it was something.

"You did not answer my question," Elleru states, her eyes upon Rey, boring into her.

If she remembers their previous chat before the baths, she certainly doesn't show it, not even a hint of coyness in her expression when she asks similar questions, hits similar beats. She's still trying to smile, but there's a serious edge to her tone, her interest in Rey -- and what she has to say -- sincere. This upright helped her, and she wants to know if she can do the same in some way.

"No," Rey retorts flatly, as though the words are acrid on her very tongue. She doesn't miss a beat when she speaks. "It's stupid. There's no point."

That's what she keeps telling herself, anyway. Live for yourself, that's what someone like her brother would say -- what Undine would have likely said, if she were alive. Maybe even Faye would have agreed. But none of those people are here now, so what good does it do for Rey now?

It'd be too much to tell someone who barely knows her what a vile and hateful creature she is. People get frustrated and give up eventually.

They have to.

Rey's a stubborn thing, but so too is Elleru; however, her frustration is starting to show, her brow tightening. Was this the same upright who had been kind enough to help her before? Why was she acting so standoffish now?

"There is only no point because you think there is no point," she remarks sharply, sitting up straighter. "And that tells me you do want, but you will not let yourself want."

"And why do you care? What do you get out of it?"

Elleru was acting awfully friendly the last time they spoke, too. Up until towards the end, that is. Is she just acting like that didn't happen, or was it so insignificant that she doesn't care anymore? Or did that even happen at all? What if Rey is the one who isn't remembering things right?

How annoying. She grunts, rubbing her forehead. Between this and the sleep deprivation, it's all really making her brain spin. A headache is starting to come on now.

Elleru leans on the table, looking Rey in the eye.

"What I get is an understanding of you," she answers. "Of why you act the way you do. It helps me to be a friend, if you would let me."

She brushes her hair behind one ear.

"It is okay to want, Rrey. I want many things. I may not acquire them all, but it is not wrong to want them, and to work toward them."

"And what do you want?" Rey says sharply, though the harshness of her tone has diminished somewhat in hopes that Elleru would indulge her for now. It's clear that she's not comfortable being the subject of scrutiny, whether Elleru intends it that way or not. Rey just doesn't have it in her to pour her heart out to some random person who gets curious enough right now. "What do you get out of this?"

Why do people try to learn so much about one another? Is it a bonding thing? On the surface level, it's probably a bonding thing. But Rey can't help but suspect ulterior motives, like whether someone might be digging for info. In some lines of work in her past lives, she would consider this to be a tactic used to probe for intel that could be used against someone at a later time. Even when that doesn't have to be the case, the slim possibility of it being true is still too much for her to easily overlook.

Rey might be dodging the question left and right, but Elleru seems perfectly happy to answer it right then and there. In fact, she seems more than happy -- maybe even a little annoyed that Rey hasn't figured it out for herself yet. Is she being too subtle? Are uprights not perceptive, or is this one simply ignoring the obvious because she does not want to see it?

Whatever the reason, Elleru spells it out plainly.

"I want. To be. Your friend. You are here alone, save for your interesting companion. He loves you, but you do not love him. You push away those trying to be nice to you. It is difficult to connect with strangers, but I am trying."

She sits up again, tall and proud. "If you want me to leave, I will leave. But you cannot say I chose that. You cannot say you are disappointed, or that it was expected. Choose."

If anything else, one would have to commend the tenacity. It's not all the time that Rey meets someone who's keen on something as trifling as... friendship with her, and she'd be lying to herself to say that she enjoys the total solitude. She didn't like it in the sky prison, and she doesn't much like it here, either.

Whether she deserves the companionship or not, or a bizarro mutant creature's 'love' for that matter, it's not something she can really afford to dwell on for long. Either she bites the bullet or eats one, and the latter has never ended well for her. Against her judgment and her very nature, she can't quite bring herself to that brink.

"Whatever, it's a public venue, so do what you want. Can't really make you leave." She waves a dismissive hand. "That enough of a choice for you?"

It's the closest thing to consent as Elleru is going to get at the moment, so she keeps her tone light and permissive rather than irritable, though still somewhat robotic.

That might be the closest thing to consent Elleru is getting, but having Rey bend even a little is enough to placate her for now. The corners of her mouth rise in a soft smile.

"It is good enough."

Perhaps Rey is too proud to admit she'd like the company, she considers. She was too proud to admit she has wants like any other being, after all. That's okay. Bit by bit, she'll get to know her. Any upright willing to help her in a time of need is worth knowing.

She sets her elbows on the table, leaning on her hands. "So. What books do you like to read? If that is not too invasive of a question."

It is in that moment that Rey pushes aside all of the earlier bullshit and remembers where they are right now -- a library.

Oh, maybe that's why Elleru was so intent on keeping quiet earlier. Not that it matters, with how goddamned empty the area is.

"Well, um." Rey's brows arch as she thinks. "Anything by Faulkner, really. Liked Margaret Fuller's work, though hers was nonfiction. Read a few more... modern books as well, but those were more available at the townhouse..."

Old literature was pretty commonplace at her father's old home back in Chicago. For six years, reading and recreation was the only thing keeping her from going completely insane again, so some of those nonfiction pieces helped more than she probably realized at the time.

Despite not recognizing a single one of those authors -- and how could she -- Elleru listens intently, her eyes affixed on Rey, ears lifted in interest.

"I am not familiar with those," she admits, "but as you are from another world, I would not be. I enjoy books with... relationships. And adventure! And some that I may learn about other peoples, though I have found none like any of those in this place." She pouts. "I have only a few books from my home to keep me company."

Well shit, of course she wouldn't recognize those names. It's clear just from the way she looks and talks that Elleru likely isn't from the same world as Rey. She winces internally, before adding, "War stories, mostly. And, er... philosophy."

Words that kept her grounded when everything around her felt like chaos. Words that she could somewhat relate to, even if their experiences might not all be the same. Whatever she could find that soothed the madness, she kept close.

"By 'relationships', do you mean... romance, or...?" What other type of stories focus on relationships?

While Elleru might not have recognized the authors, she does seem to recognize the topics, nodding at Rey's short list. War stories of interest to someone with many scars. Was she a soldier, then? She certainly seems like a fighter, at the very least, from what Elleru has seen.

"I like all relationships," she clarifies. "Friendships are good, but romance is better. How interesting it is to see how... people fall in love." She managed to avoid saying uprights there, but the pause was noticeable. "There are so many ways I did not expect. Sometimes, it is dangerous, and other times, it is a dream."

Fortunately, the brief pause doesn't strike Rey as odd. This woman clearly isn't human, so she has enough sense to put two and two together...

Speaking of which... The more Elleru talks, the more familiar her voice sounds. It's not like she heard anything through text, so it wasn't that. No, something else about her gives Rey the impression that she's being reminded of... something. What is it, though?

God, she's tired. Maybe it won't be too weird to keep her head rested on her chin. It isn't rude to talk with your eyes closed, right? Like she would care if it was.

"Romance, huh?" Can't say she's surprised. "What about it is so interesting to you?"

Now she's reminded of the phantom brush of a thumb on her lips, however brief that it might be. Rey has never really been into that stuff before. These days, she's not so sure, and she's avoided confronting it whenever possible.

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